Sometime last year I was scrolling through the pages on the blue app and I found one of Torkwase’s questions, it read; “what is the ‘hardest’ truth/fact you have learnt?” I started to type my reply and stopped right in the middle of it. I couldn’t write it. I was half pissed and half ashamed. I didn’t write anything. Today, 13 months later, I remembered that question and I have the same reply.
I lost a very dear friend on the 4th of December 2020, on that same day my sisters came into town. They were sad for me, they knew what I was going through. The thing is, when I woke up that morning, I had a truck load of responsibilities I had to see through. It was the reason my siblings were in town. I never knew that before the day would get going I would get the news about my friend’s passing. The next day was the wedding of one of my cousins. I was responsible for almost all of the planning.
I didn’t explain what I meant by “my sisters came into town”. My sisters and I have this thing. We can talk, laugh and go crazy for hours, especially when we haven’t seen each other in a while. I had been looking forward to seeing them for weeks…but when they got here, I was numb. I spent the entire 4th of December in a haze, running errands and trying to be normal. I didn’t sleep. Not even a wink. By day break on the 5th, I decided not to put a damper on the wedding and its activities so I decided to put up a facade and be merry with everyone.
It turned out to be a beautiful day. I ended up having a lot of fun. My staff and students cooked and served the food at the wedding and it was lovely. I had another wedding cake to present at the other side of town, I tried to do it but it couldn’t work out, Sandra ended up doing that for me and she did great. The whole family had a great day. We took lots of photos and caught up with all the family members we hadn’t seen in a while. After the wedding, we sat at my dad’s house and talked and shared drinks till almost midnight.
That was when it hit me… I lost my friend, it hurt. It really hurt but I went ahead and did the things I had to do and continued with my life. That truth shocked me, it upset me and there was nothing I could do about it, it was the sad truth… Life goes on.
So Torkwase, that’s my sad, ‘hardest’ truth/fact… Life goes on.