I’m a big fan of small crowds. Very funny right? Yes, small crowds. What’s a small crowd by my standards? I come from a family of 7, mum, dad and 4 siblings. However, it was never just 7 of us living together. We always had extended family and sometimes friends and even paid help living in the same house with us. I can confidently say we were never less than 15 people under the roof of our small 3 bedroom flat. It never felt crowded at all. Never. We enjoyed different activities together, we ate together, we worked together. My mom was big on neatness and cleanliness so the ‘work together’ part was very important. Gradually everyone grew up and we’ve all gone our separate ways but we are still closely knit together. My siblings and I keep in touch and talk almost everyday, and it’s the same for the others… Terhemen, Moses, Esther, Angor, Terhemba, Saalu, Imoter, Shimayam and so many more. Every now and again I find myself craving small gatherings like the environment I grew up in. I find joy in small friendly crowds of 10 or so.
In this big love we shared and still share,We didn’t hug. No, we didn’t. My family wasn’t (and still isn’t) a hugging family. This didn’t mean we didn’t love each other, I guess we just expressed our love in other ways, hugging wasn’t just one of the ways. We were more into loud hailings and high fives… Yeah. I never gave it a thought or see anything wrong with it till I grew up and started mixing up with other humans. I’ve learned that people have different ways of expressing love and affection. I also think it’s a learned behaviour. You are either born that way or you learn it from people around you.
My 8 year old is a complete hugger. He can just walk up to me and hug or when I’m busy and can’t see him coming for a hug, he just alerts me by saying “mummy, hug”. I think he has made me more open to others. Lately I’ve found myself hugging family and friends before thinking about it…that’s new. I think I like it. I feel less rigid.