Happy birthday Asomy

You would have been 43 years old today. I hope you are dancing up there in heaven because I know that’s exactly what you would have been doing here by now. When you left us and I went searching for words and quotes of consolation, I found one that couldn’t have said it any better. It started “a limb has fallen from the family tree”. You see, when you left, that’s how it felt. You were a very vital limb, you held most of the tree together.


I have been struggling with words to say or write to you, to express exactly how I have been feeling since you left. Words to help with a little relief… the words refuse to come. You see, I found out a while ago that when I write, I feel better or might I say, lighter. Also, I wanted to write because we all know how much you loved to read, so I told myself writing was another way to express how I feel about your absence, perhaps you would read it. I tried to compare your absence with the absence of a vital spice in a meal but I couldn’t find the right spice to describe you for whatever meal I thought about. You weren’t one spice, you were a combination of many spices.

Asomy, since you’ve been gone, we have been missing you. Everyone seems to be handling it differently, I guess we are all different. While some of us may try to mention you fondly in some memories, some of us can’t keep it together when your name or anything about you is brought to remembrance. I have learned, people handle grief in different ways. I also learned that it doesn’t get easier with time, people just learn to handle it better.


Asomy, since you’ve been gone, I fight a battle of words within me everyday. You see, I was grieving the loss of my friend when you left, I got a double blow and it really hurt. I tell myself that you are both happy and in a better place and just when I think I’ve convinced myself, I begin to remind myself of how much it hurt. When will this battle within end? I hope it does really soon because I really believe you are in a better place, it only hurts to know you won’t be back… oh there I go again.

We love you. We will carry on family gatherings and togetherness just like you did.

Asomy T

I love you. I will always remember you.

Happy birthday over there.

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